Facts

What is my line, you ask?
Why, I deal in facts. Facts, sir. Facts, I say.
And the fact is, I deal exclusively in facts.

Now you may agree or disagree—it’s of no consequence to me either way, sir,
For the facts are plain: I deal in facts, that fact is clear.
They’re no mere sideline, but occupy my attention fully.

And what, specifically, are the facts?
Why, that I do in fact deal with facts, sir;
Those are the obvious facts in this specific case.

Of course there are, in fact, other, less obvious facts as well—
For example, that some facts are more subtle than others—
Faugh! it matters not a fig! for none escape my assiduous eye, no!

I deal with them all, sir, facts great and facts small,
Facts grandiose and facts infinitesimal.
In fact, I am proud to state, I ignore no fact at all.